New Glasses

I got my new glasses yesterday - they're quite different from my others. After about 20 years of sticking to little gold frames, I've gone for a larger frame in fine purple metal. They look very nice. And nobody has noticed them, which I always take as a sign that they are very 'me', so that's good.

Today I was looking at jobs, and noticed an advert for 'an Impatient, Elderly Occupational Therapist'. Of course the word was actually INpatient. I like glasses with a sense of humour. My sister and I regard these mis-sightings as part of the silver lining of getting older.

I'm still struggling with pasting anything onto here, which is frustrating cos I have loads of poems ready to go! I'll keep trying. I must have missed some button somewhere.

I'm back to the doctor's this afternoon - he's going to refer me on to a specialist I think, which will be good as my knee is very painful. I should also get my blood test results, which I am hoping won't show that I have Rheumatoid Arthritis but - if I do, I can be treated. I've dreamt about it several times, which is rare for me - my dreams are usually fantastic, narrative epics in full technicolour, rather than obvious references to real life. Perhaps once I know one way or the other, it'll stop. (In my dreams I always have RA, so we'll see how accurate they are, or whether they are playing to fears).

There's a lot to be said for being slowed down. It's painful to walk, but I make sure I concentrate on what I can see as I go, rather than the pain and the speed. You notice much more -particularly other people with limps, who have emerged from all sides, reminding me of how the world seems to be poplulated entirely by pregnant women when you're pregnant yourself.

My little town is a haven for the crippled - I've noticed since I moved here that the pavements are swarming with mobility scooters (rendering pedestrians less mobile, but we all co-exist quite happily). So I feel quite at home as I hobble over the cobbles.

Meanwhile, I'm spending time reading up on the Law of Attraction. In my Christian days I would immediately have dismissed it as a load of materialistic bunkum (but then there were Christian movements such as 'Name it and Claim it!' which were just the same). However, I think the Law is what you make it. It is possible to interpret it as the Way to get Wealthy but I think if you are a little more discerning, there is some excellent, helpful stuff in there about pursuing one's own spiritual path.

I've also read Jekyll and Hyde, as part of some research for a class homework on Horror. It's a very interesting read, and although I found the style a little elderly at first, once I'd got into it I was more than ready for the excellent last chapter, in which Jekyll discusses the struggle within him. Having only seen bits of films, I had always assumed that Jekyll was Good - but the whole point (it seems to me) is that Jekyll remains human - ie a mix of good and bad - and THAT is what allows Hyde to conquer, because the evil in Jekyll identifies with Hyde and therefore makes him stronger - he draws from both sides of the personality whereas Jekyll's goodness is ever-diminishing. It's a powerful comment on all the bad habits we allow to grow, I think.

Countdown to Fifty!

This blog is my birthday present to myself. My 49th birthday is in two days' time, and I am really excited about starting my fiftieth year on the planet! So far, each year has been better than the last. I realise there may be a tipping-point sometime in the future, but - so far, so good.

Many people are so afraid of the ageing process; yet it's the one thing we can't prevent in life. I look 'young for my age' - even at 48 I only have a very few silver hairs... but in a decade I shall probably look much older than many of my peers as the plastic surgery culture eats into our self-respect and feeds our adulation of youth.

I wanted to make my voice heard in favour of embracing the ageing process. Just to be clear, I don't consider 50 old at all . I'm the youngest of four, all of whom are outrageously young for their age as well, and the oldest woman I ever knew was 107, which puts it all into perspective, don't you think?

I'm reading a lot about the Law of Attraction at the moment. It's a theme I shall return to, but for now I shall content myself with shouting out to cyberspace, "THIS IS GOING TO BE A WONDERFUL YEAR!!!!!!"

Hope yours is too, do follow me through the next twelve months and see how it goes! :)